Zombie Apocalypse Training

ever heard of the Zombie Apocalypse? c’mon, who the hell hasn’t, with more face-eating druggies roaming the streets every day, and movies such as Resident Evil, Zombieland, and Shaun of the Dead. [to name only a few] if you’ve been stalking my Twitter feed, or haven’t blocked me yet from Facebook, you’ll know i’ve been chattering a lot about the Zombie Apocalypse, and the training i’ve been doing for it. that, of course, is just a joke… i don’t actually think that the T-Virus is suddenly going to break out of the Umbrella Corporation’s underground facilities, or some other version of that story. the story that’s been re-hashed and beaten to death with a baseball bat and a sawed off shotgun… repeatedly. 

once upon a time, i was one of those folks that found exercise updates on Facebook/Twitter irritating… mostly because i was jealous that i was sitting on my couch eating a cup full of chocolate chips and playing video games while the offenders were out exercising and doing something good for themselves while i couldn’t get my fat ass off the couch. finally, i decided i had to do something to better myself as a human being. i joined kenpo for socialization (kinda like sticking your kid in pre-k so he can learn to get along with other kids…) and when i realized that my cardio fitness was shit, i had to do something more.

my husband’s been running all over our neighborhood for over a year now, so i decided to give it a try. when i joined kenpo, he bought me 4 really good sports bras (onces that are tried and true and guaranteed to hold my ginormous DD’s in place) so i was outta excuses. i use FB and Twitter to catalogue my life, so like it or not, stories of my running antics would be going on Facebook and Twitter. i don’t like boring updates, though. saying “oh hai i went running today” is just so…. uninteresting. to add a little flair to my updates, i called it my “Zombie Apocalypse Training”.

what, you ask, does the Zombie Apocalypse have to do with jogging down the street every day? well, if you’ve ever seen Zombieland, then you know there are 33 rules to surviving the Zombie Apocalypse, and Rule #1 is Cardio. introduction of that rule is followed by a great scene of a loving dork named Colombus running from zombies in a parking lot. he runs to his car while being chased, and drops the keys while trying to get the door open. he hurriedly picks the keys up, and makes another lap around the parking lot with the brain-thirsty zombies following him the whole way. 2 laps around the parking lot, a marathon, and an amusing moment later when he realizes he left the door unlocked- he makes a getaway due to good cardio conditioning, and the ability to run around the parking lot repeatedly. subsequently, when i decided to get my poor lungs back up to snuff, i dubbed it my Zombie Apocalypse Training. it adds a fun spin on an otherwise extremely boring subject.

so far, i’ve been running for 2 months. when i first started, my first mile was run between 11.5 and 12 minutes. that, in my opinion, was just awful… i knew i could do better. i set my first goal to get my first mile in under 10 minutes. today, i finally met that goal! i ran a mile in 9 minutes and 22 seconds. this is the first time i’ve ever set a fitness goal for myself, and actually attained it. i’m hoping it’s the beginning of a new trend. [of setting goals, and actually meeting them]

wish me luck, and remember… CARDIO.


Running Shoes [Review]

a good pair of running shoes is everything. well, not really. actually… humans run best without any shoes at all. that’s the way our bodies built our feet, and that’s the way it should be. centuries of uncomfortable shoe-wearing have weakened our soles to the point where “Podiatrist” is a lucrative career choice. in an attempt to keep my feet strong and healthy, i have taken to running with as little shoe as possible. i don’t run barefoot because i just don’t have the concentration levels needed to avoid shards of glass, stones, and other road debris.

Enter: Minimalist Shoes.

my entire feminine life has been filled with flat-soled girly shoes, so buying a pair of minimalist running shoes wasn’t that big of a deal for me. in fact, my first pair of “running” shoes were a pair of these:

Merrell Barefoot Life Wonder Glove

they may not look like traditional running shoes, but let me tell you- they performed the task flawlessly. Merrell makes extremely high quality shoes with a Vibram sole, so they’re practically indestructible. recognize the name “Vibram”? yes,they’re the original makers of those ugly-ass toe shoes. toe shoes are great barefoot shoes to run in, but unlike my husband, i just can’t bring myself to sacrifice fashion for practicality. after all, i AM still just a woman. i love my Barefoot Life Wonder Gloves. they’re comfortable, they’re cute, and they’re extremely functional. except… i didn’t want to run in my cute shoes every day, and wear them out sooner.

once i realized that running was something i wanted to do for a long, long time, i decided it was time to splurge on a quality barefoot running shoe. there are tons of brands to choose from. barefootrunningshoes.org is a great resource for seeing all of them lumped into one website. i didn’t do much shopping outside of the Merrell website, though. i trust the Vibram soles and the Merrell quality, and knew that i wanted to go with them.

one thing about barefoot shoes that you have to understand, is that they should literally fit like a glove. i didn’t want to buy a pair of shoes without trying them on first, so i waited. and waited. and waited. then finally, while i was on vacation i found a store with a large selection Barefoot shoes. i tried on 3 different sizes before i went for the 9’s. (i’m normally a 9-9.5 in regular shoes, depending on the brand. my Wonder Glove’s are a 8.5, but a little too snug)

meet my new running shoes:

Women's Barefoot Run Pace Glove

so far, i love them. they have a little more sole than i would like in a barefoot shoe, but they grip the pavement beautifully and make me feel like i can fly. they’re super light, and i love the colors. i have big, fat ankles and feet so they were a little tight across the top of my foot at first, but after a couple runs they’ve really broken in well, and i can slip them on and off with no problems. i didn’t realize it until looking at the Merrell website, but they also come in wide sizes, although not in this color, if you need it. they’re a little pricey ($100) but totally worth the cash. they’re put together well, and i expect them to last a long time.

Merrell Barefoot Run Pace Glove gets 4.5 out of 5 stars from me… i only took the 1/2 a star away for the slight grip and arch support the shoes have. true barefoot shoes shouldn’t have any, imo. either way… i’d buy them again, and if they still make these in 10 years when mine fall apart from use, i’d buy them again.